Seeking Birth Family
At I AM ADOPTEE, we believe that the decision to search for birth family members must be the sole propriety of the adopted person. At I AM ADOPTEE, we know that search and reunion can be daunting and overwhelming. We want you to have all the resources to guide you. We also know that searching is only part of the process. The aftermath of a search, whether connections are made or not, can be the toughest part of this process. Here is what we have prepared for you…
10 Question to ask yourself:
- What do you know is your story (based on your referral information or based on what you were told by your adoptive parents)?
- How would you feel if your story is totally different upon reunion?
- Why now? What is happening in your life that NOW feels like the right time?
- Who are you searching for?
- What are your questions?
- What are your memories? What images do you have in your head? What smells, sounds do you remember? What do you think you remember?
- Do you have any distinguishing marks or scars on your body that might help identify you to your birth family?
- What do you know about your birth country at the time you were placed for adoption?
- What do you know about your birth country now?
- What if you don’t find anyone?
10 Things to do:
- Write what you know – letter to self…”This I know to be true of me”
- Map of support – who are your “go to” people for emotional support
- Interview another adoptee
- Read these blog posts and articles:
- Write a letter to your birth – mother, father, sibling….
- Find a local adoptee organization to meet other adoptees who have searched
- Compile all your adoption paperwork
- Write a synopsis of how you think your birth family is now
- Learn a little of the culture
- Find good counsel for yourself